Mysterious ways

"I am a vegetarian. The only exception are worms. Some of my best friends were worms.

A few days ago, I got stuck in the sand. I decided to make the best of it and get some sleep. I was far too restless though. Counting my right leg toes only took a few seconds: one...two! Counting every day of my life took a bit longer: 65 years x 365, sometimes 366, days makes.... Counting sheep was no option. There was only one nearby and I knew for sure that was a wolf.

Anyway, I was just loosing my nerves when someone pulled me out. It was a backpacker. He threw a Hollywoodish smile at me and told me never to bury my head in the sand again. When I promised to switch from the worm diet to the Birdwatchers, he sat down and told me his story.

His name was Bono. (Strange name for a human being. Sounded more like a gorilla to me.) Of course he had noticed that people started whispering whenever he was around. Of course he knew what that was about. And of course he had buried his head in the sand because he had been ashamed of his teeth. That was all until a few months ago, when he had finally found what he had been looking for. He had left his home country for some clinic in Bulgaria and came back a different man with a better breath. He really looked pleased with himself and his super white, super straight teeth that he kept flashing at me. Finally, he said: "You too could smile, Big Bird!" and left.

You know what? He was right, because then I saw a worm...."